Back to School Blues? Co-Regulate with Music at Home.

Back to school blues? It’s the end of August, and for many of you, perhaps this is your child’s first week back to school! There are so many emotions packed into this week and the several that follow, as you both reacquaint yourselves with the school year routine. Also, your child may possibly need to adjust to the sensory environment at school, a new classroom, new social dynamics, and new cognitive demands. You and your child may feel tired emotionally and mentally. You may both have reduced patience as you find your new flow of pace and
communication through the daily routine. Perhaps your child has a lot of energy and needs to move after sitting for a while in the classroom? Perhaps you have extra tension due to it all!

At Healing Harmonies, our music therapists use prescribed approaches to help your child co-regulate, preparing them to engage in their session successfully or simply to bring them to a more comfortable body state than when they arrived. We do this through helping identify
feelings and emotions, and meeting their unique sensory needs. Many of us find where to start, from you, their guardian! Getting information on their unique sensory profile, the type of sensory they seek, avoid, and some things they may need (deep squeezes, fidget items, movement). We start here and design the music experiences from there! This could look like yoga or dancing, vibrations from a resonating instrument, or tactile sensations from a cabassa or guitar strings. The possibilities are endless!

However, your MT is not present 24/7, and you may need some additional tools in your idea box for decompressing at home. Co-regulation is likely something you already do naturally with your child, even if you don’t give it a name. It is necessary for the emotional development of individuals from all walks of life. So what is co-regulation? Co-regulation involves providing support (such as visuals or sensory accommodations), modeling, and guidance to help your child identify, express, and modulate their feelings and emotions. The following resources provide a more comprehensive explanation and tips for practicing co-regulation:

Music is a quick, efficient, and accessible way to match one’s current state and modulate it to where one needs to go. Here are some simple and safe ways to engage musically with your child within the zones of emotion, to co-regulate together. Helpful considerations when applying include remaining calm, starting where your child is, structuring it into your day, making it part of your routine, and using visuals to model or help identify feelings and emotions. Hopefully, one of these may meet or be adapted to meet your kiddos’ unique sensory needs and get them in the:

🟢 GREEN ZONE

Calm, happy, focused.

🟡 YELLOW ZONE

Got the wiggles and energy to spare!? Dance!!

Turn on a favorite tune and move – this could also be adapted to hitting a drum or a pot with wooden spoons or hand-in-hand dancing.
Add structure: take turns picking a move and/or add stop/go with a “freeze dancing” song.
Bring it down: play 2-3 and gradually slow the pace with each, ending on an energy level that is doable and comfortable for you all.

🔴 RED ZONE

Rough and Rowdy? Try an energy release.

Grab a big pillow (sensory water pads could work too), turn on their favorite upbeat song.
Let your kiddo drum their hands into the pillow as hard as they like.
Add structure – try taking turns or directing different ways of jamming with the pillow (throwing up and catching, reaching up high and hitting the pillow with both hands, tossing back and forth). You could also try using your pillows like boxing pads and
alternate pillows for them with music to follow and tap.
Pick 2-3 songs to help slow the pace and transition into squeezes or yoga moves with the pillow. Or simply lie on a pillow and take some deep breaths or sing a familiar song.

🔴 RED ZONE

Overstimulated and Need to Ground? Use sensory instruments

You can purchase various sensory instruments like these: Ocean drum* (tactile, visual, auditory, and proprioceptive), HAPI drum* (tactile, auditory, proprioceptive), jingle sticks (visual, auditory), cabasa* (tactile, proprioceptive). Consider the sensations that fill your child’s cup and select your sensory instrument from there. Be mindful of your child’s responses, as the qualities of an instrument could be overstimulating. This can be observed by presentation of maladaptive behaviors (aggression, crying), the
presentation of an unhappy affect, or resistance to participation. In these cases, reduce or avoid these items. *These items can be purchased online at amazon.com or westmusic.com
Provide a comfortable space for your child where the sensory stimulation they avoid is absent and they can seek the sensory stimulation that feels good to them. Here, they can tune in to the play and decompress from the flood of sensory stimulation throughout the day.

🔵 BLUE ZONE

Tired and/or Tearful? Use rhythm and connection.

Have you or your child pick a song they may enjoy, grab each other, or a favorite stuffy toy.
Sit together and give hugs or squeeze the stuffy toy to the beat
If needed, you can pick up the pace to bring them to a state where they can play or do the next task. You could offer pillows as boxing pads and alternate between tapping to get them moving and waking up their minds. Use a sensory instrument that excites them, or try some dancing.

If your child is in music therapy at Healing Harmonies, feel free to reach out to your music therapist and inquire about sensory regulating strategies you can try at home! Below are some helpful examples of visuals and resources to get you started.

Healing Harmonies is passionately dedicated to utilizing the power of music and art with human potential to change people’s lives. Check these websites for more details: